My goodness it's windy today! Quite horrible. Glad I'm indoors. I hate this weather. The wind really gets to me, makes me quite unsettled and irritable.
So, Christmas is over, the new year is here and that means that I have two months until I go back to work. Can't believe it. Maternity leave this time seems to have gone so quickly. Arthur still isn't really moving much (he loves to stand but not to move....apparently quite normal for a boy...). Isobel has gone to nursery today for the first time in 2 weeks - she was not a happy bunny. We had such a lovely afternoon yesterday when I took them both out for a walk and there were millions of muddy puddles to jump in! On my run later that evening I thought about how I needed to try to enjoy and appreciate every second of my day with them both, however hard it is at times, as they won't be little for long.
Anyway, Christmas. We now have a house full of yet more Peppa Pig stuff - stickers, jigsaws, books, slippers......all we need is the real thing! Isobel had a great time with her cousins - she has 7 - they looked after her, played with her, took her to the park and generally entertained her endlessly. Then she came home to the dullness of just her mummy, daddy and Arthur. She has been swinging Mary (the doll) back and forth in one of those tipptioes things which hangs from the door frame. This has proved to be great fun. The only problem is that when Arthur is in it she swings him almost as energetically!
I have had time to reflect a little over Christmas, in part to help me think about what I'd like to achieve this year. Some reflections:
- I have two gorgeous children. Yes, they are a challenge at times but they are still gorgeous.
- My husband isn't too bad either (;-))
- No one tells you the truth about being a mum - certainly not about labour and birth and certainly not afterwards. It takes a long time I think for people to be honest about how challenging they find it at times.
- I tried to do too much too soon after both children. It was hard not too. It is definately in my genes not to sit still. Perhaps this contributed to exhaustion which contributed (perhaps) to the PND.
- I seem to have set myself very high benchmarks and as a result can drive myself to accomplish a lot in a day rather than being more flexible and perhaps more realistic about what life with two little ones is really like.
- I love to bake. I love to eat baked goods. I suppose I should try to reduce this a little in the interest of health health.
- I love to run. It gives me a sense of freedom. In the past I used to just put my trainers on and go. It was easy without children as you could go whenever you wanted. Now it's harder but I've found a way to do it (with Peter's help) and it has made me feel so much better.
- I do a lot to please other people - my parents, Peter, my children etc. but perhaps not enough to make myself happy at times.
I could go on. Needless to say I have been thinking about the challenges this year will bring - going back to work being one and all the changes that will mean (Arthur into nursery, the mad dash to get to nursery and back to the train etc - whether there will be any space on the overcrowded and overpriced train is another matter!). So, I thought about some resolutions, some of which I'll share here (others are for me, and maybe for Peter only!)
- Keep up my running 3 times a week and enter a race to have a goal to work towards
- Exercise some portion control when eating cake!
- Try to do less each day - maybe just one activity a day rather than filling my day with things to do and things for the children to do
- Do more sewing (to offset the baking!)
- Appreciate every second I have with Isobel and Arthur
- Appreciate every second I have with Peter
- Delegate more at home and keep challenging myself as to whether I really have to do that thing I think I have to do!
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