Thursday 2 February 2012

Things I learnt today

And I also wrote this one and pressed the wrong button and it all went away! Doooooh.

Oh well.  So, I went to Wisley today.  I love Wisley (as you know).  It was very cold but the sun was out (my favourite type of weather).  I went to see some old family friends, one of whom is very poorly with cancer. 

I learnt a few things whilst out and about though, including:

  • Henry VIII had an older brother called Arthur, who died and therefore the crown passed to him (bypassing his sister who I think is in that book 'She Wolves' which I gave Peter for Xmas to which he said 'is this more feminist propaganda'? Men, honestly);
  • That 33 children have died in custody since 1990;
  • That Woman's Hour (Radio 4) had run a part of their programme on favouring one child over another which sparked a whole load of responses, including this one on a blog:
It made me think about last week when I had a bad day.  Isobel was being particularly challenging and I was being particularly sensitive!  I've been trying to keep a note of when I have bad days to see if they fit with any pattern - in particular hormonal ones!  Nothing yet, but let's see.  A friend came over and witnessed the Isobel tantrum in full flow - I lost count of how many she had in the space of a few hours!  Not because she wasn't allowed to do something like have a toy or watch TV, but because she was sooooo frustrated at wanting to do something which she isn't yet capable of doing (or it isn't safe to do - like scooter in the car park!.  My friend made me feel better as she couldn't think of anything else I could try to do differently to try to reduce the number of tantrums!  I managed to get her (Isobel that is, not the friend!) to go to sleep at lunch time for the following few days - a miracle as that isn't something she likes to do at the moment.  It made a massive difference but by the end of the week (yeeks, it's Friday tomorrow!), she is so tired it starts all over again.

My friend is lovely.  She's an honest parent.  I know lots of honest parents now - ones who tell you when they have had a bad day, how hard they find it at times etc. (as opposed to the ones who have angels for children, and are no doubt already fluent in latin and greek at the age of 3 and only ever eat fruit, vegetables and never any cake!).  Honest parents make you feel better and keep that smile on your face even when everything inside is screwed up in a ball! I love Isobel really.  She is quite delightful most of the time.  She can also be highly independent, spirited, challenging, difficult....oh how many ways to describe it!

So, what are we currently doing to let her have more independence?  Well, much is the same as others - choose which of 2 tops to wear, put things in the bin, go to the toilet herself - and now, I purchased a small jug (cheap, doesn't matter if Arthur grabs it and engages it in his current game of 'I wonder what will happen if I throw this on the floor') which she can have milk in and add to her cereal in the morning to avoid the meltdowns when she realises she can't lift the large milk carton as it's too heavy!  Let's see what happens tomorrow.

Tomorrow.  Apparently it might snow.  We will mainly be making grandpa a birthday cake.  We have a plan.  And Isobel has found him some lovely pink candles.  Bring it on.

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